Friday 28 November 2014

WORKSHOP 7

Today's post comes from a Juncture 25 workshop. We meet twice a month and the second meeting is always a workshop. This time Gram Davies led us in an exercise he'd seen used by poet Kei Miller
The task was to write a number of random words on individual pieces of paper, then to swap them with the other poets, who wrote definitions on other pieces of paper. The idea was to have a list of words and juxtaposed definitions. We then had 45 minutes to turn this material into a poem.
I decided to try and write a poem using the definitions. here is a further revised draft.

When this life is not as you wished
and a shadow hangs heavy over your heart,
let me be your signpost. For
don't we all not sparkle brighter than
this light that falls upon us?
Please don't let this combination of skin, blood and bone fool you.
We are a fabulous idea shaken from the brow of God.
We are incandescent,
as bright as the stars that bequeathed us are atoms.  
This is the draft from the workshop. The words in italics were the ones I lifted from the exercise.

When this life is not what you wished for
and a shadow hangs over your heart,
then you live a life of dread.
I will be your signpost, point you in the right direction
for do we not sparkle brighter than the light that falls on us?
Are we not fabulous ideas shaken from the brow of God?
Do not be fooled by this combination of skin, blood and muscle,
we were created from the condensation of water at great heights.
We are incandescent, as bright as the stars that gave us these atoms.

It illustrates, I think, the power of revision. Yes, I know, I harp on about the importance of revision all the time.

I leave you with Kai Miller.

No comments:

Post a Comment